Posted by jan
on December 23, 2008, 1:27 pm, in reply to "We're almost through it...."
72.175.193.124
... that only you moms could hear without telling me what a despicable person I am.
Last week I began using my Facebook page for the first time since I've had it... have been adding all kinds of friends (mostly Lora's) that I'd lost track of through the last ten years.
Then today.... today I saw a picture of the third girl in the car Lora was driving when she was killed. There were 3 girls in the car: Lora was driving, there was a front seat passenger, and this third girl was in the back seat. She's the only one who survived.
So here's this picture of the surviving girl... and her baby boy....... and God forgive me, but all I wanted to do was scream at her, How dare you smile! How dare you have a baby! How dare you be alive!
I've settled down since then... and, in truth, she's alive BECAUSE OF my Lora. Had this girl been driving, all 3 passengers would have been killed, because this girl would have "choked," whereas our Lora, having been a Jock her entire life, managed in the two seconds she had before impact (according to the police) to cut the wheel for the ditch -- which changed the motion of the car, and kept the girl in the back (the only one with no seatbelt) from going through the windshield.
But for about a half an hour today..... my heart was black as black with hate for her, and for her lucky parents.
Yeah, I've apologized to Him... but it's amazing how you can think you're doing good, and then all of a sudden out of nowhere...
Thinking of you all with love,
jan
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