Posted by trish
on February 12, 2009, 10:43 am, in reply to "Re: depressed"
76.69.103.223
hi sandra...my first child christopher died in 95. he was 2 years old...he drowned..at that time my other two boys were 7 and 9...then in dec. of 2006..my middle boy was killed in a car accident he was 17.....i really don't know how i'm surviving...God is carring me thru this....my family unit has been changed sooo much..its hard to accept...i know my children are in heaven...and one day i will see them again....but i do miss them terribly...i miss what could of been....but most of my focus is on my oldest boy, brad...he really needs us...and i love him so very much..my goal is that he doesn't turn from God and his faith...so far so good....yes i want to be with my other boys soooo bad..but i also want to be with my brad...i'm cought in two worlds like all the other moms here....i was first scared to mention that two sons have gone to be with the Lord..cause here it seems to scare so many people away...and they think its contages...cause the biggest fear we have is to loose a child...and when it happens we fear that it could happen again...i did...and the fear for me came true.....i didn't want any of you guys to feel intimated...and scared to talk to me...thankfully that didn't happen......i'm going thru the same emotions as you guys and the same struggles..and i also pray that some will see that you can go on..even if you don't want to..its not easy at all...the only reason i did was for my children, cause the ones left behinde are just as loved and just as important as the ones that left to be with the Lord......i do believe once my oldest moves out alot more of my greif will be coming out...i do hold a lot in for my son's sake...hugs and prayers to you all.....
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