Posted by Patti
on September 18, 2009, 12:02 am
209.150.95.140
Hello everyone and welcome Gloria,
I have had a very busy summer. All my grandkids came to visit on separate occasions, and I also just got a brand new little grandson. His name is Alexander and he is 5 weeks old. My emotions are up and down. Bobby's birthday came and past, and even though it has been three years since he died, his birthday just gets harder and harder for me to handle. He died right before his 37th birthday, and he would have been 40 this year. I still can't believe he is gone. Even though he died, I still feel like he is here with me most of the time. Tonight, I had a meltdown of sorts while sitting in the truck waiting for my youngest son to come out of a meeting. Something just came over me and I started crying and asking God - WHY? I was thinking about when Bobby was just a little boy, so beautiful and so smart - the joy of my life, and now I don't have him anymore. It is just too much to bear at times. I hear a song, or eat something that reminds me of Bobby - a movie, even when a firetruck passes, I think, Bobby used to be a fireman. He used to wear that uniform. WHY is he gone now and not here? Life just is a long hard journey for me since he died.
I am going to close now. I am sorry if my thoughts have brought any of you down.
Love,
Patti
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