The camera fully pans out, revealing the man holding the spatula to be none other than Logan Neilson, singing absent mindedly, head bobbing in time with the beat, as he folds the omelette over and starts to dish it up.
(Logan): *Singing* If you want it get it, go and break my heart! Take me to your blackened sky!
He stops singing due his mouth being full and turns around with his plate in hand and jerks to a stop, noticing the camera for the 1st time. He swallows before lifting a small remote from the counter and turning off the music.
(Logan): What dae you guys want?
(Camera man): Err; you requested promo time today didn’t you?
Logan squints trying to remember if this is true before shrugging.
(Logan): Might have.
Logan just stares at the camera man for a few moments gauging him, his tongue flicking out to lick his lips briefly.
(Logan): Cool. Ye’ll edit this bit out right?
(Camera man): Yeah sure.
Logan claps his hands, picks his plate back up and strolls to the living area. He gestures for the camera man to follow before slumping down on the sofa.
(Logan): So what dae ye want tae talk about?
(Camera man): Um, you called us here.
(Logan): Aye well I’ve clearly forgotten why, couldnae have been that important, but yer hear now, might as well talk about something.
He shrugs again and takes another bite of omelette.
(Camera man): Well… no ones heard from you since your press conference. What have you been doing?
Logan nods in acknowledgment, and chews faster then swallowing deeply.
(Logan): Not a lot tae be honest. Been working out like a man possessed. If ye had been here earlier we could have made a sweet as f*ck Rocky montage.
He lets out a snort of amusement.
(Logan): But seriously I’ve been preparing hard for the match at Blood, Sweat & Tears. I honestly feel in the best shape I’ve been in since joining the H-W-A…. So what about yerself?
(Camera man): Sorry?
(Logan): What ye been up tae?
(Camera man): Um not a lot I guess. I was just sent round here to do your promo, wasn’t really expecting this to be honest.
Logan takes another bite from his omelette, encouraging the man to continue.
(Camera man): If I’m not needed here, I could go and come back tomorrow if you wanted to do a work out promo?
(Logan): Look man relax. I know most guys might have some massive pre-scripted horse shite ready for when you get there but wi me it’s more light hearted.
He grins.
(Logan): It’s banter, it’s real life… Who knows something exciting might happen, or we might just sit here and play X-box.
There is a pause as Logan finishes off his omelette and sits the plate and cutlery on the small table beside him.
(Camera man): ….You got Modern Warfare 2?
Logan grins broadly.
(Logan): Aye! It’s the f*cking baws! I just noob-tube folk, gets them raging!!
(Camera man): Damn I hate noob-tubers.
Logan laughs in triumph.
(Logan): I know mate, me too. But I just dae it tae annoy other players. Am a bit of a dick that way.
He breaks off laughing to himself to the memory of previous games. Just then the apartment door opens and Ally Wilkinson squeezes her way in carrying at least ten different bags; that bulge out forcing her to come in sideways.
(Logan): Ah sorry mate, nae COD today.
He gets up to help his girlfriend with her bags.
(Logan): Hey honey, spend another fortune today?
The camera man quietly stands up and shuffles off screen, back around behind the camera.
(Ally): Of course.
She kisses his cheek and takes one bag with her to the sitting area, as Logan takes the rest and pretends to tidy them away. (Leaves them in a corner of the room)
(Ally): Come here Logan; guess what I bought you today?
Logan eyes her up suspiciously, noticing the excited look on her face.
(Ally): Do you want a clue?
(Logan): Aye go on then.
He takes his seat slowly, as she allows one of the handles of the bag to drop; opening it enough for her to reach in and produces a leather studded collar and a leash. She looks at him with barely constrained joy.
In response, Logans jaw drops, his eyes darting sideways at the camera, a look mixed of shock, confusion and embarrassment on his face.
(Logan): Err, Ally ye know am up for anything but did ye no’ think tae talk tae me about this first and maybe pick a more… ‘appropriate’ time?
She stares at him in bewilderment for a few seconds and finally clicks.
(Ally): No! No! I got you a puppy! You Idiot!!
Slowly Logan’s expression changes to realization and then relief.
(Logan): Oh… Ohhhhh! Aye, I see.
They both break into laughter for a few seconds when Logan finally recognizes the real gift.
(Logan): Wow, a dug, awesome! Thanks honey! What made ye think tae get me a dug?
(Ally): It’s not a “dug”. It’s a Pug. And he’s just a pup. I don’t know. I guessed you must get lonely up here on your own most days.
(Logan): That’s true. Awesome, am still excited, where is he? What’s his name?
(Ally): Ha-ha. You get to name him silly. What do you want to call him?
Logan ponders for a moment and then smiles to himself.
(Logan): Tam.
(Ally): No.
(Logan): Jack.
(Ally): No.
(Logan): Victor.
(Ally): No.
(Logan): Winston.
Ally scowls.
(Ally): No!
(Logan): Och… Naveed?
(Ally): No!
(Logan): Pete the Jakey?
(Ally): Ha-ha, what? No!
(Logan): Boaby!
There is a pause as Ally’s eye’s light up.
(Ally): Like Greyfriars Bobby!?!
Logan shrugs.
(Ally): I like it. He’s from Edinburgh too!
(Logan): Aye. I meant Boaby the barman fae Still Game… but aye, that works! When can I see him?!
Ally checks her watch before jumping to her feet.
(Ally): We can go get him now if you want? I had all the bags with me so said we’d go pick him up.
(Logan): Ya dancer, I’ll get ma coat.
He dashes off, and Ally stands up and unruffles her skirt.
(Ally): Oh yeah, just remembered. I got that card you wanted for Diana. Did you find out what hospital she is at?
Logan reappears a confused look on his face.
(Logan): Oh aye. I remembered after ye left that she had said she wanted tae be at home. Go naturally an’ aw that. But when I called no one was there, so I called around all hospitals in East Scotland, worked up a huge f*cking bill on ma phone, but couldnae find her. Was weird.
A grim expression crosses Ally’s face.
(Ally): You don’t think she’s… you know….
(Logan): Dead?... Naw…..Well…. Hope not.
(Ally): It’s a bit strange though.
They both take a minute or two to get their coats and shoes on. Once ready they silently leave the apartment hand in hand as the scene fades to black.
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