Both men are completely oblivious to the presence of the camera at first, lost in the moment, and taking full advantage of the relaxing effect that the room is creating, and neither appear troubled at the sweat pouring out of them.
The door swings open slowly thanks to the boom mic operator, and the camera moves in; the sound of it causing Heinrich’s eyes to snap open, and focus on them, the only reaction made. Eyeing them for a few moments, he tilts his head towards his brother, clearing his throat.
(Heinrich): Cameras here.
Hans groans, not even bothering to sit up.
(Hans): Is it that time already?
(Heinrich): Must be.
With a further groan as his body courses to life, Hans sits up, and swings around to match his brothers seating position, adjusting the towel around his waist to ensure correct coverage remains.
(Hans): Time flies…
He rubs at his eyes, while Heinrich throws another glance at the camera and the men behind it, a smile being drawn from him as he does so.
(Heinrich): Liking the shorts guys, very colourful.
He aims the next words at his brother.
(Heinrich): That’s dedication for you; taking your pants and jacket off just to get an interview done on time.
Chuckling at this, Hans runs one hand through his hair, allowing the air to escape his lungs slowly through tautly drawn lips, before with a firm shake of his head from side to side, he allows his arms to fall to his side, and his attention to become fixed on the camera.
(Hans): Right, let’s get this done then.
(Cameraman): Ready when you are Hans.
(Hans): You wanting to stay for this Heinrich?
(Heinrich): *Chuckling* I got in this sauna for a good reason, and nothing is going to shift me from it until I’m good and ready to leave it. Go for it.
Hans’ head nods at the camera, signalling his readiness.
(Cameraman): And we’re beginning in five… four… three…
He trails off, obviously mouthing the remaining two digits silently, and Hans takes the cue obligingly…
(Hans): Well, since my opponent’s contribution to the HWA’s combined air-time this week has been little more than five minutes of him sitting on a recliner and internalizing his thoughts… on the economy, the state of the world’s environment, the latest episode of his favourite show, our upcoming match, who truly knows? I’m not a mind reader by any stretch of the imagination, so like many of you sitting at home, I too, would pay a penny for his thoughts.
So, I’m left here instead to find other ways to fill my contractually obligated airtime with… and before long, into the breach steps Talon Wilkinson, craning his neck up at me from the Spotlight division, and ever so ready to cut into me with his barbed comments.
And hurt me they did Talon. Why, I just had to put on my “three quarter length shorts, Converse trainers and my best-selling ‘Baron’ t-shirt” and hightail it over to this sauna so that I could use the steam as an excuse to cover up the fact that I was crying…
…
…
With laughter.
You’ve laid down the gauntlet though Talon, so I focus on dissecting a single piece solely do I? Well. Let’s see if I can’t play a different note for a change then shall we? But where to begin…?
Hmm. I know. You standing in a nightclub, and having the gall to berate me for playing the Playstation. Are others besides yourself not allowed to spend a little time outside of the gym? Are the rest of us bound to the mantra of all work and no play? Do we all have to be in it 24/7 like McNeil obviously has to be?
Reductio ad absurdum? You bet.
At anyrate, kindly take your remarks about me becoming complacent with my title, and not ‘being hungry‘, and shove it.
And yes, that is a threat. A threat from a man that you couldn’t beat despite me having to go through two other guys just to get to you. You were daisy fresh, and hit me with your ‘Affliction’, and trapped me in your ‘Killswitch’ numerous times, and yet there I was at the end of it, standing tall. The winner.
Maybe I’ll be feeling generous the next time we meet, and gift you the win. Put us back on an even keel, otherwise we risk it becoming like the wins to loss ratio that I have with Eddie… and we all know your ego couldn’t take that…
…
I’ll save you the effort of retorting along the lines of ‘well you’ve never beat Ronnie one-on-one’, and admit that, yes, that is the case. For now…
Anyway. You may think I was playing cute by doing what I did in my interview the other day. But face it, even at your age, you must know that the media confines it’s questions to the same page time and time again. You know what’s coming. You know find yourself saying your response automatically. Perhaps when you actually get to experience the carousel of media engagements that being World champion brings properly in future, you’ll understand. I gave them what they wanted, and I got it done in time to grab my taxi. In the time it took you to get to the point about finding my promos boring, and how I deliver my lines badly, I was able to solve Africa’s food shortages…
Incidentally, much like you’ve not harped on about my Lottery for a change, I too haven’t made much noise about you having a terrible reign as World champ. And that’s because everybody knows you had a terrible reign, whereas regarding my Lottery, you’ve just not been on air much lately to say anything about it.
So, come on down to the ring with Ronnie if you want. God knows you NWO types are practically joined at the hip as it is, so I’d hate for any of you to suffer separation anxiety…
You want to stand there and talk about bringing stuff to my doorstep? You want to talk about wrath? Huff and puff little boy, your periodic reaffirmation of your desire to win and overcome everyone may sound bloody good when you say it to yourself in the mirror every morning, but it’ll take more than hot air to blow me over.
So come on down.
And just try and make good on your threat Talon. You’ll knock my teeth down my throat will you? Really? Will you?
I’d love to see you try…
With that, he allows himself a pause, settling himself back into a relaxed posture. A realization flashes across his eyes though, and with an almost apologetic tone to his voice, continues.
(Hans): Oh, I almost forgot. I’d love to see you try, just after Ronnie tries to take my World title from me. Because, as you so helpfully reminded me Talon, I’m the Baron, and he’ll be my victim…
With the corners of his mouth creeping upwards, he signals for the camera to stop.
(Heinrich): Much appreciated you two. In fact…
He gets up, holding the towel tight around his waist with his left hand.
(Heinrich): I’d say we at least owe you two a drink for going beyond the call of duty here…
He gestures once more at what must be their state of dress as the scene fades to black.
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