Antonio Romano: Well I’ll be damned. This one please!
*Antonio takes his finger and slams it down on top of the paper. The nurse slowly rises out of her chair and looks at the paper.*
Nurse: A...are...are you sure? No one ever visits that room.
Antonio Romano: Yup....that’s the one! I’d completely understand if you had that room cordoned off for reasons of annoyance and b###hiness.
Nurse: Haha. Maybe you do have the right room after all sir.
Antonio Romano: Oh you don’t have to call me sir. That is so formal. Just call me Mr. Romano.
*The nurse stares oddly at Antonio and isn’t sure if she should laugh. She decides against it.*
Nurse: Ok Mr. Romano, please just walk through those metal detectors and sign in with security and then it’s the second floor, last door on the right.
Antonio Romano: Thanks lady. Oh…here!
*Antonio picks up a pen and scribbles on a piece of paper and tosses it to her.*
Antonio Romano: There’s an autograph for you sweetie. You’re now the envy of every other girl on earth. See ya later sweet cheeks.
*Antonio makes his way to the metal detectors and walks through. They blare in his ear and he makes his way back through. He empties his pockets and tries again but the detector still blares. He fingers his eyebrow ring and his ears.*
Antonio Romano: Look it’s probably my fourteen piercings here that are setting it off. Can’t I just bounce on through?
Guard: Sorry sir...let me just get the hand held and we’ll see what the problem is.
Antonio Romano: You can also call me Mr. Romano you know!
*The guard starts at Antonio’s feet and works his way up. The detector barely makes a sound until it gets to his waist. Suddenly it goes nuts.*
Guard: Mr. Romano, I’m going to have to ask you to disrobe!
Antonio Romano: Ok but you better buy me dinner later or at least some shoes.
*Antonio opens his jacket and the guard is stunned. A few onlookers are standing in awe with their mouths open at the sight. Standing in the middle of the lobby is a six-foot one man with jet black hair, and two big gold belts around his waist.*
Guard: What the hell is that?
Antonio Romano: What do you mean? Everyone knows what that is! That is my championship titles. Ok, these are just replicas of the HWA Tag Team and World Championship but soon enough I will have the real things.
Guard: Those are huge! It could be weapons if you hit someone with them.
Antonio Romano: I know! It’s great. My pipe draws attention but no one b###hes if I bring this ringside! It’s like they’re allowing me to bring my own weapon!
Guard: You can’t bring that in here!
Antonio Romano: What? Oh come on ####er! Listen man, I am a future champion. I’ve become the most well respected man the wrestling world has ever seen. The second I walk out through those curtains the entire world bursts out into chants about how much they adore me. These replica belts mean the world to me and I’d very much like the opportunity to show it off during my visit. Please don’t take my joy away. Perhaps I could hook you up with some tickets and you could see me in action at Havoc. I am taking on some idiot, maybe you know him…Stu-E Price.
Guard: I hate Stu-E Price! Ok fine go on in, but don’t make me regret this.
*Antonio smiles and gathers his belongings. He grabs a pen and signs in.*
Antonio Romano: Ok I signed in. You’re rich once you sell that paper now!
*Antonio saunters away as the guard looks to be fuming.*
Guard: ####ing Stu-E Price!
-------------------------------------------------
*Antonio walks to a series of elevators and presses a button. He looks up and notices the elevator is not close and a door is nearby that leads to the stairs. Antonio decides to walk it and hurries up the stairs two at a time. He opens the second floor door and sees nothing but a large hall with wooden doors spaced similar distances apart from each other. He walks down the entire hallway admiring the putrid green color the walls were painted. He had always wondered what it would look like if you puked after eating green jello, pea soup, and pistachio ice cream. Antonio comes to the end and finds the door with 217 on it. He knocks at the door but no answer comes from inside. He looks around and knocks again but still no answer. Finally he pounds on the door and a faint voice tells him to come inside. He opens the door slowly and steps inside, unsure of what he will find.*
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INTERLUDE 1
*We are inside a small house on Staten Island in New York City in 1994. There are Christmas lights hung throughout the house and a very little boy is happily clutching a new toy he just received. A young boy in spider-man pajamas sits by the tree and an older woman passes him a card from under the tree. There is a couch nearby and a young woman, who is drinking beer early in the morning and an little boy who is fiddling with his new Tiger Electronics hand held game currently occupy it.*
Grandma: OK Antonio, this one is for you from your mother!
Antonio Romano: Ok, ok gimme gimme!
Santino Romano: Relax bro it’s not going anywhere.
Antonio Romano: Yeah because you got your game...I want my present.
Grandma: Relax Antonio! Good Catholics practice patience.
Antonio’s Mom: And nine year old children on Christmas practice an unbelievable desire to want things. Let the brat enjoy himself. He’ll be ten in a month and before you know it he’ll be a grown man.
Grandma: The real question is when will his mother grow up, if ever! But I suppose you’d be too deep into that twelve pack to come up with an answer for me.
Antonio’s Mom: Heh...I suppose I would be after all!
Antonio Romano: THE CLOSET!
Grandma: Come again little one!?
Antonio Romano: It says I have to go to the closet and look inside!
Grandma: Well, then I trust you’d better go check it out then!
Santino Romano: Knowing mom, she probably killed Santa Claus and stuck him in there for a laugh.
Antonio Romano: No one can kill Santa. He’s amazing like Spider-Man and no one can stop him.
Grandma: Stop teasing your brother Santino!
Santino Romano: Sorry grandma! I was just having some fun!
*Little Antonio rushes to the closet door and then slowly turns the handle. He holds his breath deep inside his sternum and flings the door ajar with all his might. His eyes widen and he drops the card he was holding. A smile flies across his lips and he yanks his gift out of the closet.*
Antonio Romano: A BICYCLE! I got a bicycle. YES!
*Antonio’s brother and grandmother are smiling at his show of happiness. Santino looks over to his mother and whispers.*
Santino Romano: I thought you weren’t going to get it for him? You said it was too much for a little brat like him.
Antonio’s Mom: It is. I worked hard for my money and I am not wasting it on a jackass like him. I bought him that G.I. Joe set he got from Santa. His grandmother decided he deserved the bike for doing so well in school. She bought it and put my name on it. She can never leave well enough alone. She spoils the kid.
Santino Romano: I suppose you would have just locked him in the closet!
Antonio Romano: MOM! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
*Antonio jumps over his brother and throws his arm around his mother’s neck and gives a huge kiss on the cheek.*
Antonio Romano: It’s the best gift ever. I love you mom! Thank you!
Antonio’s Mom: Ok glad you like it. Relax though you almost spilled my drink!
*Antonio’s Mom’s eyes meet her mother-in-law’s and she gets a look of disapproval as usual.*
Antonio’s Mom: Well just don’t ride it in the house.
Antonio Romano: I won’t! I love you mom...I always will!
Antonio’s Mom: Yeah, yeah me too and I always will too! I’m sure we’ll always love each other because we’re family.
END OF INTERLUDE 1
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*Inside there is a small apartment like setting with a large room and two smaller rooms branching off of it and a bathroom door open right by the entrance. There is no kitchen and the old television on top of the wooden dresser is switch on but the sound is off. At the far end of the room is an old plaid couch. A fat woman looking to be in her forties sits on the couch and crochets a blanket. She glances up and a shocked look appears on her face and quickly vanishes. She goes back to what she was doing and doesn’t look Antonio in the face again.*
Antonio’s Mom: Momma always said lock the door or you’ll never know what kind of freaks will walk in.
Antonio Romano: At least she gave you some sound advice. My momma always said shut the #### up while my show is on you waste of sperm.
Antonio’s Mom: Sounds like good advice to me! So I suppose the freak show is in town if you’re here!
Antonio Romano: Yeah they sent me to recruit the fattest woman on the planet. Who knew it was you?
Antonio’s Mom: And why do you care what shape I am in Maniac? Oh wait...I forgot you like to beat up your family. Ok just let me finish this row and I’ll let you lay into a few times so you can feel like a real man.
Antonio Romano: Grandma always said to stick to what you’re good at in life. And it’s not Maniac anymore mom. It’s Antonio... Antonio Romano. The days of Maniac are as long gone as you’re size 6 days. I’m using my real name. I’m a champion among men.
*Antonio holds the replica HWA Tag Team and World Championship Titles up and smiles slyly.*
Antonio’s Mom: So is that what’s got you coming back is it? I wouldn’t be so damned proud of it if I were you, they are just replicas. I got a week’s worth of jello pudding on the line with a nut job upstairs and I’m betting Stu-E Price takes you down at Havoc.
Antonio Romano: You follow HWA?
Antonio’s Mom: I watch every week just hoping you get your ass handed to you. First time I saw you, I nearly shit myself!
Antonio Romano: I thought I smelled something funny in here. Speaking of funny...what’s with security around here? I mean you kill someone and they put you in a place as easy to get into as this?
Antonio’s Mom: You and I both know I’ve never killed anyone! Originally I was in a real nuthouse with serious security and medications that I didn’t need. But good behavior and some blowjobs landed me here. They say I might even get out soon. Too bad it won’t be in time to see you lose.
Antonio Romano: Is that right? Do you guys get cable up in this shit hole?
Antonio’s Mom: Yup and we get it for free!
Antonio Romano: Free? Ain’t that about a b###h! My own girlfriend had to pay forty bucks to watch me kick people’s asses on TV!
Antonio’s Mom: Stu-E Price is twice the man you are, he is a real fighter. I know that he could kick your ass any day of the week. Antonio you are going to lose at Havoc against Stu-E Price and you aren’t going to walk away with the HWA Tag Team and World Championships and I can’t wait to see your execution. I’m foaming at the mouth already.
Antonio Romano: My guess is you foam at the mouth for cheetos these days. Seriously call Hollywood and find out if they’re turning Moby Dick into a movie. You could play the whale. Scratch that! You could play the ocean! Your folds could flap up and down like the waves. No special effects needed!
Antonio’s Mom: Special effects? You mean like the illusion you’ve cast that paints yourself as a champion worthy of those titles?
Antonio Romano: The only illusion is the fact that that you think you are attractive!
Antonio’s Mom: This is only slightly worse than you having it!
Antonio Romano: I am a champion mom. I am the superhero I always knew I’d be. You are right though. Beating Stu-E Price will be no easy task and most people would fold. But then again, most people are not a champion. Most people can’t send them down to the mat with the viciousness that I can. Only I can beat Stu-E Price and keep on proving my dominance in the ring! See part of being a champion is rising to the occasion. I’ve been a champ before and I know the drill. Champions have supernatural powers. When it seems like we’re out of gas we reach down and find that special something that keeps us going. It makes us kick out when we’re out cold and it keeps us swinging when we can’t even figure out where we are. Stu-E Price has lost that. He will realize in the middle of our match that I am the poison to his success. I am the antithesis of him. I have his number. I will beat Stu-E Price, I will climb that ladder, and I will become the HWA World Heavyweight Champion whether you or anyone else likes it.
Antonio’s Mom: And then get kicked in the balls by the HWA World Champion?
Antonio Romano: Don’t mention that. My balls hurt just thinking about that.
Antonio’s Mom: Oh did you want mommy to kiss the boo-boo and make it all better?
Antonio Romano: And you say I’m a little too risqué with the family members?
Antonio’s Mom: Well, I’m not the one with my fist buried deep inside my brother’s face.
Antonio Romano: SHUT UP! You don’t know what you saw…it didn’t happen like that. Don’t talk about that! It was a long time ago.
Antonio’s Mom: I didn’t know there was a statue of limitations on discussions of beating up your family. If only Stu-E Price knew the favor he would be doing the world by getting rid of you. I should send him a letter. “Dear Mr. Price...please destroy my son so he cannot beat the shit out of anymore family members!”
Antonio Romano: SHUT UP ####! You’re insane...that’s why they’ve locked you up.
Antonio’s Mom: You and I both know that to be untrue Maniac!
Antonio Romano: Antonio! My name is Antonio Romano!
Antonio’s Mom: Change your name and run all you want. The lord still knows what you’ve done boy!
Antonio Romano: If he wants to judge me then I say beat him down and nail him to a cross!
*Antonio’s Mom seems shocked and quickly makes the sign of the cross.*
Antonio’s Mom: BLASPHEMY! Heh... beat him down and nail him to a cross you say? Is there anyone you won’t beat up?
*Antonio springs forward and grabs his mother by the shirt and yanks her to her feet. She is massive but he is still taller and stronger. She is scared but tries to remain calm.*
Antonio Romano: I’ve told you to let it go mother! I’m not a little boy anymore. The days where you belittle me and I take it like a schmuck are far-gone. You will do as I say if you still enjoy breathing.
Antonio’s Mom: Please...put me down. I’m not well. I have a bad heart. I got very lazy and depressed and I ate a lot and gained weight and...
Antonio Romano: And countless other shit I don’t care about, I’m sure!
Antonio’s Mom: So what is she like?
Antonio Romano: Who?
Antonio’s Mom: Your girlfriend!
Antonio Romano: Ashley? I love her. She doesn’t mind when I have to do crazy stuff, like stomp the piss out of people. She accepts that everything I do is too good to be true. Plus her tits are huge. Seriously she can poke out your eyes when those nipples get hard.
Antonio’s Mom: I used to have a body like that before you ruined my life.
Antonio Romano: Yeah but you were a filthy cum-guzzling #####, and I never ruined your life. I didn’t beat you up, I didn’t send Santino to go avenge you and I didn’t shoot Jordan. You won the world’s worst mom award for years and karma caught up with you ####er!
Antonio’s Mom: WHY? Why have you come here? For years I haven’t had to see your face unless it was on television and muscular men were trying to kill you. Now you show up at my door waving your replica belts in my face and making fun of me. Why did you come to see me after all this time? Tell me!
*Antonio loosens his grip and swallows hard. He stares down at her aged face and tries to remember the mother he once knew. He cannot decide if there is any pity in him for her. He decides he has none and comes to the conclusion he should not linger here with the spirits of the past for longer than he must.*
Antonio Romano: Do you...do you keep in contact with him?
Antonio’s Mom: Him who? Oh dear lord deliver me from evil! Your...brother? You come here after I haven’t seen you in years and have the gall to ask me if I’ve kept in contact with your brother? You go to hell!
Antonio Romano: I’ve been to hell and back. I was born into it by you and I’ve won victories over many people while fighting in the thick of it. My career proves I can go to hell and not only survive but thrive. For proof of that you’ll need no more than to watch me dispose of Stu-E Price at Havoc. That will be then but this is now. Answer me dammit. For once in your life stop squawking nonsense about God and answer me.
Antonio’s Mom: After you abandoned him like a cheap piece of crap he came back to me. When I was locked up he was placed in an orphanage where he stayed for seven years till he turned eighteen. He would write me letters and I would respond out of boredom at first and then out of habit later. He came to see me after they released him and told me he would kill the person who actually beat me. That much I’m sure you know. He never told me if he did but he would send letters and occasionally pop up. He was working as a wrestler in some federation so sometimes he would come out here. He made it a point though that we never talk about you. Whether or not he ever knew what became of your worthless hide, I don’t have a clue!
Antonio Romano: When is the last time you saw him?
Antonio’s Mom: About a year ago but he wrote me a month or two back. He moves around so it takes him a long time to get his mail sometimes. I haven’t gotten a response back from him yet after I replied.
Antonio Romano: Where do you think I can find him?
Antonio’s Mom: You can’t! You stay away from him. He’s had enough of you for a lifetime! Just let him be. He is happy working as a wrestler and being very successful.
Antonio Romano: He showed up out of the blue a short while back, banging on my door out of nowhere. Even after all these years I knew that voice.
Antonio’s Mom: WHAT? He’s seen you?
Antonio Romano: No but he was definitely trying to track me down at any cost. I was wondering if you might know why he was after me all of a sudden and what state of mind he was in. A high class man such as I can’t afford loose ends that might ruin his stay at the top once I get there you know?
Antonio’s Mom: YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM SCUM! Do you hear me? You never say a word to him. Run if you must but never go near him. I’m warning you don’t you listen to him.....
*Antonio’s Mom catches herself after her last comment.*
Antonio Romano: Listen to him? I thought you didn’t want me to talk to him cause of me?
Antonio’s Mom: That’s what I meant! You got me all flustered.
Antonio Romano: Wait a minute psycho #####! There’s a piece to this puzzle that much like all the cock in our hometown, you’re keeping all to yourself. Spill it b###h!
Antonio’s Mom: NO! You leave here at once. Christ is my power and my voice and he has no room for you. Your grandmother always said you were the devil.
Antonio Romano: Grandma freaking loved me. I was so cute and adorable.
Antonio’s Mom: NO! YOU ARE THE DEVIL! I want you out…OUT DAMMIT! Owwww!
*Antonio’s Mom shoves her son back over and over but he barely budges and almost laughs at the sight. Suddenly she clutches her chest and falls to the floor in agony.*
Antonio’s Mom: A... Antonio my...pills...right there....table.....please give...o...o...one! C...call...help!
Antonio Romano: These pills? Hmm...Nitroglycerin. Wait don’t these blow up or something? Ooh you absorb them under the tongue. Now that sounds like fun.
Antonio’s Mom: G..give me...dying...p..pl...please!
*Antonio sits on the floor next to her and shakes the pills in her face. She slowly reaches for them but he snaps them back and hides them behind his back.*
Antonio Romano: No I don’t think so. Crap from my past like my brother showing up cannot be good for my amazing future reign as the HWA World Champion. Perhaps it’s best if all those loose ends vanished. How bout we play a game called "Keep the pills away from mommy!" I’ll go first. Meanwhile I’ll tell you a story about how I am going to beat Stu-E Price. Now be quiet and don’t interrupt ####er.
TO BE CONTINUED......
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