As the last one comes to a finish, Hans picks up the remote and mutes the TV, getting to his feet with a slight groan as the heavy itinerary over the last few days and constant walking to and fro for various events, photo shoots and interviews makes its toll felt.
He jiggles his legs one after the other, getting the blood flowing again, before padding over to the minibar in the room, returning from it with a chilled bottle of Peroni in one hand, and a glass and bottle opener in the other.
Settling the glass down briefly on a side table, he cracks open the bottle, before dropping the bottle opener to one side, and pouring the Peroni into the glass carefully. He takes an appreciative sip of it once the pouring is complete, before turning to face the camera.
(Hans): Sorry to hear I’ve made your new friend mad Eddie, but that’s the way of it, isn’t it? You surround yourself with people who seem to have a predisposition towards taking offence, acting outraged and generally unpleasant towards people who have something to say about you…
He shrugs nonchalantly.
(Hans): So I can’t say I’m shocked when another one joins the bleating chorus you’ve got Angel, Anton and Davis singing already… oh wait, were singing until I dared him to say such things to my face in the case of Angel and caused him to tuck his tail between his legs and go mute, or beat Anton and Davis’ faces black and blue with my brother back at the Australian Tour…
He crosses his arms over his chest, tapping his chin with the index finger of his right hand.
(Hans): So maybe you do need someone new in there after all…
A smirk forms, tugging at the corners of his mouth, while a sarcastic edge filters into his voice.
(Hans): What good fortune you messed up and filled out the wrong form.
He ceases the tapping of his chin.
(Hans): I like it how you keep bringing up the thesaurus remark about me though Eddie. What are you hoping for, that it’ll be like holy water and a cross to a vampire? Yes, I’ve had a good education. Yes, English is my second language and I’d like to think I’ve grasped it well. Yes, you struggle to understand me half the time and it annoys the hell out of you. But come off it!
He makes a small tutting noise at the back of his throat.
(Hans): As for saying I cover up my words with ‘questionable behaviour’ from me and my brother? Please, enlighten me as to what behaviour this is. Would it, per chance, be similar to the behaviour that Anton and Davis displayed when they attacked me during ‘Blood, Sweat & Tears’? And with regards to your little barb of ‘he never ever truly says anything new’…
He leans in close to the camera.
(Hans): I think we have a case of the pot calling the kettle black, no?
He smiles serenely as the scene fades to black.
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