(Interviewer): So Butch, since the NWO made its monumental return to professional in its current guise under Eddie K, Ronnie McNeil, Talon Wilkinson and Hulk Hogan, there seems to be quite a bit of bad blood boiling up, especially between with you, Hans and Eddie.
(Butch): Oh believe me, this so-called “bad blood” between both Eddie and I and Eddie and Hans has been brewing up long before the NWO made their presence felt in the HWA.
The interviewer smiles anxiously, noticing the annoyed tone cutting through Butch’s voice.
(Interviewer): Dually noted Butch. So where do you stand right now, in the grand scheme of things? I mean there is seems to be a constant to and fro between the three of you; it all seems rather childish if it’s not too bold to say.
Butch laughs, despite himself and composes himself before he continues.
(Butch): No, not at all, you’re probably right. Where do I stand in the grand scheme of things, as you say. *Butch sighs* F**ked off…frustrated…amused…an abundance of emotions are buzzing around me at the moment. But when you have someone as ignorant, someone who is oblivious to the most obvious details like Eddie, it’s really hard to let some things be; no matter how trivial they are. Only because it’s so incredibly inexplicable how one person can say one thing and another person hears something else like it was in another goddamn language.
(Interviewer): Fair enough, would you care to elaborate further perhaps?
(Butch): I feel like a goddamn second grade teacher picking holes in things like but it has to be done simply because it bugs the absolute shite out of me how some people can be so obtuse. Anyway…
Butch sits forward in his chair, holding his left hand out, his thumb the only digit extended.
(Butch): Eddie claims he and Talon had signed pre-contracts with the HWA in the early part of 2008, which is true. Eddie goes on to say these contracts were brought prematurely into play because several current roster members, I believe he names AC James, Buff Bridges and myself specifically, couldn’t handle the heat anymore. Now you can believe of that what you may but as any die hard fan who has consistently followed the HWA knows, that I was not a current member of the HWA roster from late 2006 to early 2007, due to a sabbatical HWA Management granted me following a severe head injury that I suffered during a match with Michael Dredge.
Butch extends his index finger out to join his thumb.
(Butch): Both Hans and I have said on numerous occasions that Eddie constantly surrounds himself and uses those people around him to deflect any sort of verbal lashings we may wish to bestow up on him. I’ve pointed out people such as Angel and Anton and Davis among others. Prime examples, Dave. But never have I gone on record and stated that he does this due to his lack of talent. I have never once spoken ill of Eddie’s wrestling skills, merely my disbelief at his reign as World Champion. Another first class example of someone saying one thing, it going through Eddie’s brain and coming out something completely different.
Butch adds his middle finger to his index and thumb being extended.
(Butch): Thirdly, Eddie also claims that I’m trying to “jump-start” my career by latching onto the latest hot commodity, which is apparently Hans.
Butch has somewhat of an incredulous look on his face at this point.
(Butch): I’m sorry but that is so ridiculous that I’m not going to dignify that with a response. He also says that him wanting me to join the NWO was meant to be water under the bridge? Please, do I really look like I came up the Clyde in a f***ing banana boat?
The interviewer looks slightly nonplussed at Butch’s choice of phrase.
(Interviewer): Eh…I’m sorry?
(Butch): Basically, do I look stupid? Scottish phrase, rhetorical question. And now he’s trying to be psychological by saying I fear Hans? That he’s everything I want to be?
Butch can’t help but laugh freely now, lounging back in his seat.
(Interviewer): Are you saying you don’t fear Hans then?
(Butch): I have no reason to fear Hans, no. We’re friends and he’s the World Champion. Yes it’s true I’ve made it clear of my goal to once again become the World Champion, but I think that’s the only thing I can grudge Hans, is his World Title, but does it bother me that he has it? No, because he deserves it and is probably the most -deserving champion since AC James won it from me.
(Interviewer): Interesting, very interesting. There is one thing that’s not been covered this interview.
Butch raises his eyebrows up questioningly, awaiting the interviewer’s response.
(Interviewer): You openly challenged Eddie to a match in your last promo and in his response which you’ve thoroughly dissected here this evening; he has shown no sign of accepting or even acknowledging it, any thoughts on that?
This time a broad, large smile flashes across Butch’s face, as if he were expecting it.
(Butch): How many times do I have to say it? The man…
Butch emphasises every word by thumping his left fist into his right palm.
(Butch): doesn’t want to face me! He claims he has my heart, that he’s called me out for ages. I’m sorry, but have you ever heard a verbal challenge or anything in resemblance to Eddie ever saying “I want a match with Butch Parker”, have you? How long have you been interviewing for the HWA, man?
The interviewer answers rather nervously.
(Interviewer): Erm…around four years?
(Butch): Four years? Wow! And in those four years, you ever seen or heard Eddie challenge me or sound me out?
(Interviewer): Well…no, I can’t say that I have…
(Butch): Well f**k me sideways!
Butch’s excited and rampant tone soon lowers and he becomes slightly more serious.
(Butch): That is because he hasn’t! As long as he can help it, Eddie will avoid a head-on collision with me like a vial filled with smallpox. Which is why I’m not sitting on my arse and waiting on him accepting. I mean, did you see what I do to him at Blood, Sweat and Tears? When I damn-near killed him in a submission hold, when I practically slit his throat open with a barbed wire baseball bat. I remember him effortlessly tapping out, smacking his cold hand against my arm, thinking I was gonna let go, I could hear him gargling on his own blood, “Butch, please…stop…please.”
He shakes his head.
(Butch): Ah…good times. Plus, I only made Talon tap out for the first time in his career about an hour earlier and I’ve bested Ronnie McNeil countless times, that’s half of the NOW already, can you really blame the man for pussying out of any sort of a fight with me?
(Interviewer): It sounds to me like you’re goading Eddie now, Butch?
Butch doesn’t let his expression give anything away, merely smiling.
(Butch): Take from that what you will, Dave. Now, unless you have anymore questions, I’d like to be on my way.
(Interviewer): Erm…no…thank you for your time Butch; that was very….illuminating.
Butch rises from his chair, taking off his microphone and tossing it aside as he walks off set with the scene fading to black.
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