Logan wheels around and looks at the camera, a slightly irritated expression on his face for a few seconds before realisation sinks in…
(Logan): Oh f*ck! I left ye out here all night? Hah! Sorry mate. I crashed out, Was knackered after 5’s.
Ally checks her watch.
(Ally): We’re running a bit early babe, you can do your promo now if you like?
Logan shrugs and Ally goes of to the kitchen to make some coffee.
(Logan): I might as well then…. Maniac, Fallen and Billy have all had their own wee shot at talkin tae the camera.
He puts his bags down and rubs his hands together.
(Logan): Now it’s my turn, oh goody! … I actually have nothing tae say tae any of you but here goes. Fallen, Listen up and listen good, No body is afraid of you, or yer “message”. Stop trying tae be this hard talking, bullshitting bad ass and maybe someone somewhere might take ye seriously. It’s just a thought, promise me you’ll think about it, okay?
Logan shakes his head.
(Logan): Next is yer buddy, big retarded Billy.
Logan clears his throat, looking short on patience and wanting just to go but continues his promo anyway.
(Logan): William! Ye realise the only reason ye are in this match is tae make Fallen look like he deserves this chance? I mean it’s basically 2 on 1 on 1. But still the bookies have me and Maniac as favourites. But as much as yer just here tae even the odds tae an extent I’m glad ye’ve kept up yer amazing wit. What was it this week?… “Yada-yada-yada I’m going to win! You can’t beat me, I’m going to beat you. I will break you and hurt you, and then I will win!” .. F*cking Yawn! Say something of some relevance or just shut up. Seriously mate ye have the charisma of a mute with autism. I dinnae even dislike ye, I feel sorry they make ye compete in singles matches Billy, it’s clearly not yer strength. Just you turn up and dae yer best but dinnae be surprised when yer the first one eliminated.
Ally reappears and hands Logan a hot mug of coffee. He smiles and kisses her before sipping from the cup while she takes a seat waiting for him to finish. He holds finger up, indication for the camera man to hold on as he takes a gulp of his coffee and lets out a satisfied “Ahhh”. He puts the mug down on a table before continuing.
(Logan): And next I should talk about Maniac I guess that’s how this shite goes.
Ally gives him a disapproving look.
(Ally): Stop sulking and just get on with it.
(Logan): Fine… Maniac…are ye listening? … Because any other time I’ve spoken out about ye I’ve been ignored, so are ye listening this time?… I’m gonnae f*cking end you in that ring tonight! I’m not gonnae be able tae walk away? Yer gonnae take pleasure in hurting me are ye? Oh ye bought another broken record did ye? Well it’s time tae man up. Because ye say we’ve been going at each other for a while now, but that’s a wee porky pie now isn’t it? Someone isn’t being totally truthful. Sure I have been giving you pelters for talking the most amount of shite in HWA since the days of Eddie K and Butch Parker. But you’ve ignored me each time. Pretending not have heard me I assume? Or maybe ye were all out of cliché comebacks that day? Not tae worry, I guess you’ll get yer chance tonight tae prove it definitely, 100%, entirely had nothing tae do wi you being afraid of me.
Logan laughs to himself and lifts up the two cases with ease and Ally gets to her feet, as they get ready to leave.
(Logan): Oh aye lads, one more thing…..
He puts his left fist in front of his face and gets his right hand and winds an imaginary handle attached to his left and slowly his middle finger starts to extend until he is flipping the camera off. He smirks and turns around and opens the door for Ally and lets her walk through before following, closing the door and locking it. The camera man is heard cursing as the scene fades to black.
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